Miss You

Dear Derek,

It's been 42 days today since you left us. I can't believe it. It seems so long ago and yet like it was just yesterday. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't want to text you and tell you something, or ask you something... or show you something.

I miss my big little brother more than words can express. But we are doing okay. We are hanging in there. Colleen and I had a fun evening hanging out at mom and Bob's new place last week. We drank far too much and took our first picture together! Can you believe it? We realized after all of these years, we had no pictures! She looks great but your sis had been studying all day and I am pretty sure I hadn't even brushed my hair before I went over to hang out.

So much has happened since you've been gone. I have started my own business and just yesterday I passed my life insurance test. I can officially start selling health insurance again on my own and I know how proud you would be! I am so glad I got to tell you about all of this before you left. Thank you for being so supportive of me and I know I should have listened to you years ago when you told me to do this! Hindsight, right?

You will be happy to know that I have finally gotten to know Courtney from Chico! I love her. I see why she was your friend for so long, she's simply wonderful. She's a very special human being.

Little Girl (AKA Deandra) is 14 now, which means she is 72 in cat years. I am so incredibly grateful to have her. I know when you wanted me to take her I wasn't overly excited, but she is a piece of you that I have and I cherish. I will take good care of her for the remainder of her years until she is ready to go be with her Uncle Daddy Derek.

This time last year you were at UCSF undergoing aggressive radiation to try to put a stop to the tumor growth. You were gone almost a month! You did so good, though. We were all so proud of you. We were proud of you every moment of every day of your life. You were the absolute best part of all of us, the best human being, the funniest person, so smart and so talented. The world became a lot less bright the day you left us.

Love you and miss you,

Sis